Far too often we get caught up in the endless cycle of competition. If we're not ahead, many times we become stale and depressed. Our obsession with comparing ourselves to others has left us feeling dejected and alone. If someone else succeeds, we secretly wish it was us rather than them. I know I've felt this way plenty of times - but why?
Comparing yourself to others is a worthless cause. While competition can provide for some solid motivation every now and then, the truth is your only competition is you.
It's taken me a while to realize this, and in some regards I'm still learning, but you must focus on only the things you can control. Over the past few years I've worked on taming my ego and have seen tremendous results as in the process. Instead of wasting my time comparing myself to others, I've learned to focus on only what I can change - me. That's not to say I don't keep up with other personal development blogs or care whats going on in the world. But rather I've simply dropped my obsession with knowing what others are doing.
To provide value you must focus on creating not comparing.
Set High Standards
If you want to succeed in anything, it is essential that you set high standards for yourself. These standards must be defined by you, not your family, not your friends but you. Only you know what you're capable of. Be brave and be bold. Failure is your friend.
Having high expectations for yourself conditions you to succeed. Does that mean you will always come out on top - of course not? But having high standards at leasts positions you so you have a chance. For much of my life, my standards for myself were fairly low. I was content with being just OK. Over the years however I realized that deep down I wasn't OK with just existing. I wanted to stand out. I wanted to contribute in massive ways.
Don't let excuses keep you from living . You're bigger than excuses anyway. When you come up short accept the reality and work hard to improve. While it's perfectly OK to be ordinary realize that you have the power to change your current reality. If you're not happy with where you are, you can make the choice to grow. If you're happy with where you are consider yourself lucky and embrace it.
Kill Self Sabotage
Self sabotage is a notorious dream killer. It limits our mind and keeps us grounded when all our soul wants to do is flying. Do what you must to kill self sabotage. Become aware of your thinking. Is it mostly positive? Or is your mind cluttered with dismissive chatter?
When you become aware of your thoughts you gain control.
I know when I was growing up self sabotage was my number one adversary. Day in and day out we would have epic battles, many of which I lost. After many inner battles however I discovered my self sabotage was as powerful as I made it. Stop giving your dark side authority.
While you may find it difficult at first, you have the the ability to control your thoughts. Stand up to self sabotage, it's not as tough as it seems.
Embrace Competition
Don't be afraid of competition but rather embrace it. This doesn't mean to compare yourself to others but rather use others success as motivation. If you feel you can do a better job at something, go for it. Of course you won't always succeed. Just remember failure is future success in disguise.
Don't beat yourself up if you come up short. Taking a step, even if you fumble, is worth more than having never moved at all. When I see other personal development bloggers succeed I get excited, because I know I can do the same. While I admit I have an occasional serving of jealousy, this is usually when I'm stunned by self sabotage and not in the right state of mind.
Whatever it is you want to do, you have the resources to do so . In the age of technology there is absolutely no excuse as to why you can't succeed. Use others for motivation but never waste a moment comparing yourself to someone else. The only thing you can completely control is you.
Permission To Take Control
I used to think that in order to be successful I had to be like everyone else. But as we all know that won't get you anywhere. While it's perfectly acceptable to model someone, it is essential for you to be authentic and true.
Give yourself permission to take control. Realize that you are 100 percent responsible for your current reality.
Stop wasting your precious time worrying about whats going on around you and instead put all your energy and focus towards creating a better you. Create instead of complaining. Build instead of destroy.
Dare to experiment. Dare to explore.
Your only competition is you.
